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Generally people like a certain standard of living. To have that standard of living and not have an intense, career oriented job, you're probably going to have a long commute, putting you at 12 hours. If you're living close to your job its probably in a higher cost area, which means you'll need a more intense career oriented job to afford it. Either way, 12 hours is likely the norm for many areas. You can always take the lower standard of living trade off, but most people seem to need their Fios and their iPhones.
Why? To some, it's important to work a lot, move up and make lots of money. To others, family, having more free time, etc. is important.
I got the shotgun. You got the briefcase. It's all in the game though, right?
My dad worked for PECO in Philadelphia, and they "temporarily" transferred him to Peach Bottom. It was a 2 1/2 hour drive each way. After about 2 years of that, he realized it was going to be a lot longer than temporary, and we moved closer. During that time, my sister and I basically only saw him on weekends since he left before we woke up and got home after we were in bed.
The "temporary" assignment ended up being almost 20 years. He still had a 45 minute commute each way, but that felt like nothing by comparison.
My commute's about 15 minutes each way, and I don't think I could ever deal with a long commute. I'm a Dad first, so the extra time with the kids is worth more to me than any extra money I might be able to make further away.
had a 1.5 hour commute on a bus each way from SI to Manhattan right after graduation when I was living at home to save up some money. Recently moved into the city, now have a ten minute walk each way. Quality of life has increased tenfold. We did the math and it came to something like 1 out of ever 8 days was spent sitting on a bus. That's no way to live while in your early 20s
An interesting article from the Post a few years back that profiled two people with super long commutes.
I can sort of understand the reasoning for the Charlottesville to Tysons guy with his wife having a good job at UVA, and not wanting to uproot their kids, but the WV to Sterling guy made no sense. He lives that far away so he can have a nice property? Doesn't really make sense IMO.
Yeah, a big part of what makes me happy is being able to take my son to his judo and BJJ classes; grappling is our father-son bonding thing. It also makes my wife happy that I do that, because it gives her a couple of hours each evening to unwind and just chill. Relaxed and happy wife = happy Smiley. I'm able to take him to all of his classes because I have almost no commute. With an hour commute, there'd be no way I'm as involved in his stuff as I'm able to be right now.
We had a big fight about it at the time, but I'm so glad that I managed to convince my wife that living near my office was infinitely better than the similarly-priced-but-much-nicer mansion/estate that she had looked at in the furthest corner of Woodbridge. I'd never see them.
And that's fine, will probably just not have as many vacations and dinners out. Just meant to say that a 12 hour day really isn't outside of the norm for a sizable chunk of the population. Didn't mean to seem judgmental.
Use to commute from Gaithersburg to Capitol Hill when I worked for the government. On good days, it took a hour, on bad days, up to 2 and a half. Decided it was for the birds, plus I wasn't on the old retirement system. Got a job 10 minutes from home, then moved closer to it. Wouldn't trade it for the moon, even if my old job could have paid me more in the end. Life is meant to be lived, not behind a steering wheel. With kids, it was a no-brainer. Been to every important event in their lives.
3 hours in the car vs seeing your kids. Depends on the type of car you own and how your kids behave. For the 1st 2 years of your kids life I'm willing to bet the tranquility of your commute makes you the winner.
Long commutes suck. I live in southern Frederick County and drive to DC. It's a one hour drive in the morning and a one hour 15 minutes in the afternoon to get home. The only saving grace is I get off work at 2:30 so I get home in plenty of time to hang out with the kids and do some stuff. The bad part is I start to get tired by 9pm since I'm up a 4:30.
We're thinking of moving closer in. Some of it depends on my wife's job. She's a teacher and isn't sure if she'll keep teaching where she is or try and find something near DC?
My question is if we do move from the exburbs to the inner suburbs what's the best bang for your buck housing wise? If you could spend 500k, which is a lot of money to me, but not so much in the DC market, on a home what are the better neighborhoods for raising a family? I've looked around the Fairfax County section of Alexandria and parts of it look nice as do some parts of Springfield. Falls Church looks nice too, but it looks like your money doesn't go as far.
This post was edited by eugalc 14 months ago
You're definitely going to get a lot more house for your money in Alexandria ffx or Springfield.
My best friend is the perfect broker for you. He lives in McLean and knows that area. While on the surface, your commute may sound bad, moving to some VA suburb may only cut 20-30 minutes off your commute. To make a real impact on your commute, you may be looking at townhouses. I, too, live in Frederick County and wouldn't move to that mess unless my kids were grown up and out of school.
Cutting 30 minutes off his commute sounds pretty good.
I'm not sure why it has to do with kids/family. I think it's pretty obvious if you are spending 2 hours or so commuting you just have that much less time in your day, every day, to be productive. It has to affect your work, home, personal productivity. It's not really that scientific.
The exurbs and extreme suburbs are somewhat new for commuters as they became popular with the RE boom in the 2000's.
FWIW, since moving back to NY in 2000 my longest commute was a 25 minute bus ride in the am. I walk to work now which is nice albeit not as much fun when it's 20 degrees out
I kow a guy who does WV to Loudon and its for the same reason
Assuming he's in Jefferson or Berkeley County, WV, that commute is easy. I live in Charles Town (Jefferson County), and it's only seven miles to Loudoun County from here and only 30 minutes to Leesburg from here.
My commute to my job in northwest DC is just under two hours each way on MARC and Metro (door to door). Mrs. 74 and I moved to Charles Town seven years ago when our younger child was in her last semester in College Park. We're both 60 now and, frankly, I don't mind the commute. I lived in Bowie for 29 years and had jobs in Bethesda and northwest DC and the commutes were anywhere from 60-90 minutes, and I was doing the driving. Now, I can work, read, or nap on the train and someone else is driving. It's certainly not a lifestyle for someone one-third of my age or anyone with small children, but, at this stage of my life, there are few alternatives for which I would trade it.
Call me a relic, call me what you will,
Say I'm old-fashioned, say I'm over the hill....
Because people with kids are pretty much self-absorbed pseudo-martyrs.
classlessthug: I have too much on my plate to worry about the fact that my junk intimidates some needle D undergrad.
True, but its also because if you are single your time is your time. If you are married with kids your time is no longer just your time. If you aren't able to spend any time with kids because of your commute its going to end up negatively impacting them.
It has nothing to do with the schools, public safety, congestion, community activities, the ability to afford more than a 2 bedroom condo, or anything like that.
Most jobs are in or near the city. Most homes that make sense for the average family aren't.
If its such an issue, don't have kids... Oh wait, sorry about that.
Primarily because you're going to move them in to a far lesser home in a less desirable area. You can try to argue this but in the end, he'll either have to get a second job or a higher paying job to move to a comparable community and home. Besides, no job is forever. JMO though.
It's not an issue or a compliant. I enjoy living in the burbs. It makes the people that I love happy, so it makes me happy. Commute sucks, but that's more a function of me being in school in the evenings. Which also sucks. In the summers or when I'm done with school, commute becomes 45 min each way, which is bearable.
8 minutes each way is more than enough for me. High school was an hour each way, and I vowed that I'd never do that crap once I actually had a job
This should probably go in the unpopular opinions thread, but I absolutely hate that the suburbs (or further) have become the "normal" place to raise a family.
eamhokie94: Is your name Nazi in pig Latin?
Considering that private school is mandatory in most places in the cities, its pretty much a no brainer. If it weren't for the schools, raising a family in the city might be an easier choice.
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